The Beast Known As Beauty
by Sapphire Yin
Summary: Loneliness, darkness and pain. I fear them. I fear that it could all happen again. I don't want my past to repeat. I don't want anyone to go though what I did. For now my struggle is trying to be human. Trying to understand the things I didn't before and most importantly knowing that the ones I call family are worth much more than the man who raised me. (Rewrite of B is the B)
1. Memories

**I DO NOT OWN PRINCE OF TENNIS**

Hello my lovely readers.

Before you ask this is a rewrite of Beauty is the Beast if you haven't guessed that already. The original will still be daily updates and this is _hopefully be_ the more polished and better version. But who am I to say that, you could like the other better. If you have questions about it I'll try to answer them though PM.

Well updates for this will be slow... Very slow.

Please review and give me you opinion on this whether good or bad and I'm always open to ideas and suggestions.

**WARNING -** This contains my attempt at Yaoi in far later chapters. Also torture and other things that aren't that nice.

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**I****NTRO - To Lose, To Create And To Remember**

**~Memories~**

I saw the darkness. I can't remember much. I hear the screams in my mind, and still feel the pain that loneliness can bring. The demons from my past, ones that exist still in my present and the ones that will stay in the future. At one point that was all I could think that my life amounted to. How much I deserved what happened to me. Eyes that have seen too much. Ears that have heard all there's to hear and my hands which are still covered in the blood of others.

A man... he saved me. The ever lasting dark cloud that was drifting over my head started to slowly vanish. When the police showed up, he was the first to find me. He proved that I existed and he proved that I was not the monster I thought I was. I realized, that I no longer need to afraid of what I'll become.

The four walls. That's all I remember of my time there. Well... That and the blood that covered them. Almost like paint. The only difference is that paint should bring a sense of joy to your surroundings. The blood only brought me my worst fears. My blood. That's what it was, but it wasn't just mine. There were others. I can no longer picture their faces in my head. They got mixed in with my other thoughts. As days turned to months, which ended up being years.

The ones that had found me thought I was an experiment that went wrong. Some even suggested that they put an end to me once and for all. While the scientists, the one's that turned me into this thing, thought I was a miracle in the making. I'm what people refer to as a half-breed or a chimera is word used more often used. If you don't know what that is then let me elaborate. I'm two species joined together to make one. The first of the reasons was for science. The other was because they wanted to create something beautiful. They gained more knowledge as they experimented on us. They started to understand what they needed, so they could create the perfect one.

There was a lot of us at one point, but they all died. I was something no one, except for my creators should have seen. After all, the humans that live on the outside world don't agree with treating others like their just pigs sent out for slaughter. All of them were orphans. The ones that hurt them just claimed that if they have no family then no one will miss them. That wasn't true though. Every child there in my opinion was either a brother or sister to me. No exception. We all suffered together and most of us died in the arms of another.

Do you know what loneliness is? I bet you couldn't even dream of something so awful. In my mind I pictured it as a black hole. It resides in you. In the centre of your heart. It's when you know that no one is looking for you. No one even knows your missing. In fact, they don't even know you exist. Slowly, the thoughts eat away at you, until there is nothing left, but the empty shell of your body.

I was four, I know that much. I got brought there on my birthday. But me saying that doesn't really mean anything. There were kids younger than me there. Some not even half my age and already welcoming deaths embrace. I wasn't like them though. I had a family. I had a life. My mother was eager to get rid of me as soon as my father died. I was two then. She didn't want me and so she found someone who would pay good money to have me. I was a beauty. A rare gem that needed to be carefully cut piece by piece, until my appearance was perfect.

So at the age of two I was dead. Me, what ever my name was back then, had died in a fire. They couldn't recover the body. They say the flames were out of control. It was my mother who told the press about hearing my screams coming from the shed in the back garden. She said she was too late and I was already dead by the time she got there.

From all the faces I've seen in my years there, I remember this one little boy. No older than 3 months. He was so small. So precious. With those innocent hazel eyes that saw the world we lived in. They destroyed him. All in the name of science. He didn't even make his first birthday. They were creating a new drug, but this wasn't something that would make you better. It practically ate you alive. Going for the different organs and slowly closing them off one by one. His screams, the smell of it all. It was too much for anyone. The night when the screaming finally stopped we all bowed our heads in respect. He got to rest in peace. After the months of torture, he finally got the freedom he deserved.

I was eight when they stopped experimenting on me. I was told that I was the last and only survivor, but they lied. There were still some children left. I had found them by accident and they told me that they were my back ups. So if something ever happened to me, they would be able to fix me again. After all they didn't want to lose their perfect creation. More than a hundred children from my lifetime and the one before I even existed. All dead. Not even buried in the ground.

I got fused with the genes of a cat. Oh, but get this it wasn't just any cat. No, that would be too simple. I now shared the same DNA as a royal white tiger. An animal that is nearly extinct. They all thought that I should have been proud to now be part of such a rare and beautiful species. Proud... I had nothing that I should have been proud of. They stripped of everything that once called me human. I have nothing. Not even my name.

At that point if I had the strength I would have killed them all, just to show them how dangerous I could have been. It would have never worked though. My first problem was that I couldn't even move. Just trying to lift one of my limbs sent pain through out my body. Second, I was in a cage. I wondered at the time if they were really that afraid of me.

As I felt myself drifting to-and-fro from consciousness, I could only let two words pass my lips, but it was all I needed to say. 'Kill me.' I didn't want to live. I already felt dead. Both on the inside and out.

My master. My most precious person, looked down from where he stood. I knew at that point I did something wrong or at least I thought I did. It took me a while to figure out that I shouldn't have been able to speak. All the muttering from others saying that I was defying logic. I shouldn't have been able to form words. It was the first mistake I ever made in my opinion. The one I truly regret the most.

No more experiments, only tests. They wanted to see how I cope and how my body changed over the years. I, in some way became their pet. They trained me so that I would obey them. Not that it really worked. I was losing more and more weight everyday. I never got proper meals. I could see my ribs and my stomach could make an anorexic person look fat. Everything would have been so much easier if they just gave me something more than a slice of bread a day.

Walking became difficult. My legs had no meat on them. They were just bone covered in flesh. Eventually it became so painful to stand that I just pulled myself to a corner of my cage and stayed there. Breathing... That was another. It felt like I had gotten electrocuted over and over with millions of volts coursing though my body. A small breath felt like a years worth of pain. The problem is once you live with a pain for so long, you get use to it. You learn to ignore it. It just ends up being another thing that you find wrong with yourself.

I lost how many times I made my master angry. Lost how many times they chained me to the floor with my back exposed. I know what he did to me was cruel. I have not told anyone the truth. Honestly, I don't really like talking about it.

Running away... Never again will I try that. The one time I did and it cost me what little freedom I thought I had. It stung. The blood, my blood. It was everywhere. On the floor, up the walls. Even the ones doing the punishment got drenched in the red liquid.

Afterwards master was so kind. He unchained me and got on his knees bringing me into his arms. Hugging me. Telling me how sorry he was. But it only lasted a couple of seconds. I felt his fingers digging into my wounds, dragging his nails down in a slow painful movement. He warned me. He told me to never try leaving again or this would seem only small compared to what he'll do next time.

I always wanted to know why master would touch my face or tail so gently. He would never try to hurt those parts of my body. It was one day when my curiosity got the better of me and I asked. He told me that beauty should always look beautiful even when on the verge of death. It was then he said that a flower could hold no beauty like mine because when it starts to die, it grows ugly.

I think I was about fifteen years old when I was found, or at least what was left of me. They told me that they were investigating the children that had disappeared. Someone had given away this place and that's how they found me. The man, my saviour looked at me the way master use to. Back when I was little. With gentle eyes that held no judgement in them. My appearance didn't matter to him. For the first time, for a long time, I felt like I was safe.

I live with him now, the man who saved me. It's strange. I always wake up thinking I am back in my cage, that I'm alone again. Sometimes I would get nightmares, waking up and screaming. He would always be right beside me, hugging me, showing me that he cared for me. I would always forget what I dreamed of. If I was ever asked my mind would come up with a blank, almost like I was forcing myself to keep forgetting without even realizing I did.

I can go outside everyday now. I keep my appearance hidden. I've never been good with having others stare at me. I've also realized how easy it is to hide what I look like. My tail is easily hidden by some baggy trousers while my ears are covered by some type of hood. There are clips inside, which can slip onto the edge of my ears to hold it in place. Slightly uncomfortable, but it's better than nothing. I can walk down a street and feel like everyone else.

Everyone part of the investigation decided to keep me a secret. After all they didn't want anyone else to try to make something like me. They wanted to keep me safe and they all had their own personal connections for that. They discovered who I truly was and even help me live a normal sort of life. I have these people who call themselves my sponsors. They pay for everything. I am forever grateful to all these people.

Ryoma Echizen. That was the name given to me at birth. I'm still trying to get use to being called that now. My guardian had told me that I was the son of a famous tennis player. I don't remember my biological parents. I was too young back then. I wanted to feel closer to the man I never knew. So I played the sport he did. It became one of my favourite pass times. Considering I haven't been playing that long I thought I was pretty good at it. We lived near a street court about five minutes down the road. I haven't lost a match there yet.

Nine months. That's how long it had been since they rescued me. I been playing tennis for six of those nine. I still have a habit of letting my animal like instincts get the best of me. I don't even know how much of me is tiger. I like sleeping in cupboards or under a bed than actually sleeping on one. I prefer eating meat more than anything and get possessive of what I claim is mine.

In all this time I thought I could fight anything. Like I could go up against the world, standing tall. Who knew that my world could crumble so easily with just a few words. He said we're going to move, to a country called Japan. He said that's where everything I need is. It's where all the people I will learn to care about are.

I think I made him sad at one point. I didn't mean to. I just wanted to know if master was going to be there. But like every time I asked about him, my guardian would always tell me the same thing. 'He's dead.' I don't want to believe that. I can't.

It didn't take him long to change the subject to something else. Apparently there was a doctor there, one that he himself trusts. I don't like doctors. They scare me.

So a week of packing we finally left the place I called safe and travelled.


	2. Changes

First chappie for the rewrite :) Finally finished it. Damn, when I said updates were really slow I didn't even think I would take that long to write it and post it.

Read, review and tell me your thoughts?

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**CHAPTER 1 - It Can Be Good, It Can Be Bad, But It Will Always Be Different**

**~Change~**

Ryoma watched from the airport window, looking at the planes. He could hear the engines roar to life as they got ready to take off. He was so amazed by these machines that could fly, he didn't notice his guardian disappeared for a second to go hand the tickets in for their flight. He had only realized he was on his own when he turned to the seat next to him about to asked a question when he saw a certain person was no longer there. Ryoma jumped up and stood on his seat looking around in panic.

"Shan!" He shouted. Gaining some attention from others in the room. He could feel his heart starting to race. Just as he was about to called out the name again he caught sight of blue hair.

"Ryoma, I'm here." He rushed over to the boy. Making sure he wasn't going to continue to shout. "Off the seat." He stood in front of the golden-eyed boy. Ryoma now deciding to take note of all the people watching him, went shy and instead of doing as he was told leaned forward and wrapped his arms round the older man shoulders, rubbing his face in the crook of Shan's neck.

Shan was a 37 year old man, who had midnight blue hair and brown eyes. He was slightly short than most men his age and would never admit he was no older than 30 since he never wanted to be referred to as an old man. He was the police officer that had found Ryoma in the research lab. The place that was apparently meant to of closed down in the 1970's due to animal rights.

Shan brought his arms round the boy's waist as he felt Ryoma wrap his legs round his. "You expect me to carry you?" The blunette asked with some amusement in his voice. "Fine, but no complaining that your bored after 2 hours." With a nod from the cat, Shan could only hope that the boy could last for 14 straight hours on a plane with not much to do.

Once they stepped on the plane, Ryoma wasn't sure if he was excited that he got to ride on one of these machines or scared that it was taking him away from a place he had gotten use to. After the take off and the first hour the excitement of flying started to wear off and Ryoma was now beginning to realize that he couldn't get out of the plane until it landed.

The 37 year old, now had a headache and was trying to get the panicking boy to sit down. When the cat had come to the conclusion there was no way off he starting shouting at his guardian to get them off the machine at once. As the policeman and others that were sitting near Ryoma started to lose their patience, a hostess came over, asking if Shan needed anything. So ten minutes and more screaming later Ryoma was happily sitting down on his chair drinking his fifth ponta. The older man could only thank the heavens that the drink had saved his and everyone else's sanity.

Three hours on the plane, Ryoma had drank all remaining Ponta on board and had now decided he was tired. So instead of sleeping in his chair he moved so he could sleep on Shan's lap. He rested his head on the man's chest and gripped onto the front of his shirt. In less than a minute Ryoma was in dreamland. Mouth slightly open and small steady breaths being realised.

Shan sighed as he realized he could no longer work on the crossword in the newspaper and so put it down on the chair Ryoma had once occupied. Shuffling a bit to get comfortable he settled down with his arms wrapped protectively round the boy's waist as he welcomed sleeps embrace.

Shan felt himself being shaken awake. He looked up to see the hostess. "Sir, I would ask if you could put the boy back in his seat. We're going to be landing in ten minutes and your seat belts need to be on." Shan thanked the woman before he struggled to push himself up, taking the newspaper and placed the boy in his chair. He shoved the paper in the bag that was at his feet and put Ryoma's belt on. The 37 year old man sat back down leaning his head back into the chair as he buckled himself in. "Your son is very beautiful." Shan looked back to the hostess as she looked at the boy's face from just in front of them.

He felt lucky that they had sat at the front of the plane. Shan didn't know what Ryoma would of done if they were seated right in the middle amongst all the people. "Thanks, now I just wish his behaviour was as good as his appearance." The red-head hostess brought he hand to her mouth as she chuckled.

"So I'm taking it he takes more after his mother in the looks department." Shan gave the woman a small smile as he lifted a hand and placed it on top of the boy's hood.

"No, he takes more after his biological father in terms of facial structure, but I have no idea where the hair or eye colour came from." The woman's eyes widened.

"I'm sorry I thought..."

"It's fine. He may be adopted, but he's my son and nothing will change that." The red-headed lady smiled softly when she heard a yawn and watched as Ryoma shifted, before he rubbed his eyes and opened them. It took a while to process that he was still on the plane and stayed dead still when he noticed the woman staring at him. "Oh, sorry I forgot to ask you your name." Shan said as he took his hand off Ryoma's head towards the woman to shake. "I'm Shan by the way." He gave her his best smile, one that he claimed he could woo all the ladies with.

"I'm Olivia." She excepted the hand and gave him a flirty almost shy smile.

Ryoma frowned. He didn't like the way Shan was acting around this Olivia person. Without a second thought he grabbed the blunettes arms and pulled it until he broke contact with the other. He sent the red-head a glare before turning his head.

"Daddy, I thought mommy said to stop flirting with other women and to keep your wedding ring on." Shan looked to the cat with an all knowing look as if he was telling Ryoma not to ruin his chances with someone.

"Ryoma, I don't know what you're..." Getting cut off the cat spoke louder so it would drown out the others voice.

"I don't want to hear you and mommy fighting. It's scary." Ryoma's eyes went big as he let a single tear fall down his cheek. "Please, don't cheat on her again. I don't want to go back into care." Shan couldn't respond. People were staring. Not only that, the woman had undone her belt and went passed him to seat at the back with the other hosts and hostess. Sighing in relief, Ryoma smiled at Shan. "You deserve better." He turned his head and stared out the window wanting to see the plane land.

When they had finally landed in the land of the rising sun, which was known better as Japan. Shan had dragged Ryoma to go and grabbed their things telling the boy that he was having a friend of his pick them up. Walking round the cat held onto Shan's hand not wanting to get lost in a place like this. Looking around he stopped dead in his tracks, which made Shan pause as well.

"Something wrong Ryoma?" Opening and closing his mouth he suddenly yelled out.

"Look at that horrid pink thing." He pointed over to the said woman wearing it. "Old people have bad taste." Ryoma panicked when the old lady came over. He didn't take any notice that she was smiling. "Shan quick old people aren't fast and they don't have good memory either. We could lose her." The boy's guardian laughed. As soon as the pink lady got close enough Shan spoke.

"Hello Sumire." The cat paused when hearing the greeting. "Ryoma, this is the woman that taught your father tennis." Sumire Ryuzaki, the coach of Seigaku's tennis team looked to the boy as he was now holding onto Shan's waist burying his facing into the man's hip. "Come on, we better get going. I want to be able to unpack all our clothes before it gets dark outside."

Sumire load the cases in the back of the car, while Shan had to get Ryoma to settle down. Once the lady in pink sat in the drivers seat and the blunette got into the passengers side she spoke up. "So have you decided which school he'll be entering?" Ryoma wasn't paying attention to them he had found looking at the scenery much more interesting.

"Seigaku. The principle already knows about Ryoma so it makes life easier. They had also met a couple of times already, so he's no stranger." Shan looked behind him to see the boy pressed up against the window. "Besides, it'll do him good to try and meet new people on his own."

They sat in silence for half an hour before Shan remembered something else. "Did you prepare _that_?" He said putting emphasis on the last word. Ryoma's head snapped towards the man. Undoing his belt he leaned forward sticking his head between Shan's and Sumire's chairs.

"That!" He said with worry. "What do you mean that? You don't normally say that unless you're trying to hide something from me. Is it good? Is it bad? Do I get ponta?" Shan buried his head in his hands.

"Ryoma, sit back in your chair and please just wait till we get there and yes if you behave I'll give you a can of ponta." The boy slumped back into the chair slightly annoyed that Shan hadn't given him any information. "Ryoma look. It's our home." The cat looked to the window. He smiled when he saw the house. He knew he couldn't like Shan call it home yet, but Ryoma knew that he was going to like it. After all the blunette would be the only person in the whole world in the boy's opinion who would buy one which has a temple as part of the garden.

As the car came to a stop the boy tried opening the door when he realized that Shan must of put on the child lock. "Shan, hurry!" He said impenitently. "I want to look inside." Laughing the blunette got out and was about to open the back door.

"Ryoma before going inside I want to show you something." With that he took the cat's hand and gave Sumire a look, telling her to see if '_That' _was sorted out. Nodding, Seigaku's tennis coach took the cases from the back of the car and went inside.

Ryoma jumped up and down in excitement as they walked up the steps towards the temple. "Shan, where are we going? Is it something fun?" Smiling down at the boy they finally reached the top when Ryoma's mouth was now hanging open. "We have our own tennis court." He stated. Letting go of the blunette's hand the boy walked over and touched the net before breaking out into a grin. "This is the most amazing thing ever!" He shouted as he crushed the other in a hug. "Can we play a game? Can we? Can we?" He buzzed.

"Later Ryoma. We still have things we need to put away inside." As they walked down the stone steps, the boy still had a smile on his face. As they got closer to the house Shan pointed to the sliding door that lead to the lounge telling Ryoma that they'll get in that way.

As he enter he saw a man sitting calmly on the sofa. He had a bag and was reading a newspaper. The said man looked up when he heard the door shut. Ryoma could hear the sirens going off in his mind when he saw a white doctors jacket over the arm of the chair. As he backed up hoping he could get back out the door he felt a solid object behind him where the door was meant to be. Looking up the boy felt terrified. Brown eyes sparked as if excepting a challenge.

Half an hour later the man now identified as Doctor Akitaka Oishi had collapsed on the sofa completely exhorted while a certain cat was sitting on the arm chair on his guardians lap crying his eyes out. Rubbing his snotty nose on Shan's shoulder he mumbled into the mans ear.

"I hate you. Why would you do that? I was being a good boy. I didn't need those things in my arms." Ryoma's hoodie had been taken off by Shan as he had to restrain the boy so he could get his shots done. He didn't exactly want the boy to catch anything dangerous and then having to have him hospitalized for it. No, that would be a hundred times worse than the situation he had just gone though.

"You don't hate me." Shan spoke gently to the child. As he ran a hand though the green/black hair of the boy's.

"You're right. I don't, but that was still mean. You're a big meanie." Ryoma took a deep breath in as he choked out another small sob. "I don't want to do anything like that again. It was scary."

"I know, I know. Never again. It's all over and done with." He saw Sumire standing in the door way which connected to the hall. She walked over to the two of them and passed Shan the can of ponta he promise to the boy. Pulling the boy away from him slightly he held the ponta in front of him "See, like I said. You were a good boy." He waited for Ryoma to take the can. After a minute, Shan could feel a tick mark appearing on his forehead. "Don't you want it Ryoma?"

"I can't move my arms. The swords you stuck in them has made them do dead." He sniffed. "Feed it to me." The cat opened his mouth waiting for the drink to be poured down.

"Ryoma, I will say this only because I love you. They were needles, not swords and they wouldn't have so much affect on you to make your arms stop working. So you can either take the ponta or I'll have it." Quickly he snatched it out the others hand and gulped it down. "Wow, your arms must be really bad. You didn't even notice that you could use them." He spoke with sarcasm dripping from his tongue.

It had taken three hours for Sumire and the doctor to leave after they help Shan with sorting out the rest of the house. Not all the things they had sent over earlier had been sorted and there were the things that they had brought with them today to add to it. Ryoma during this time had chosen to watch them, claiming that he deserved to rest after such a scary experience. He was still very cautious of Akitaka. Making sure that he was always at the other end of the room to when the man was.

Ryoma was now heading towards the room that Shan had told him to, knowing this was going to be his bedroom. Looking round he smirked when he realized the lack of objects. Only a bed and cupboard were place in there. The owner of the house made his way up the stairs when he heard loud banging noises. He knew right away that Ryoma was making his bedroom look the way he wanted. Once the noise had stopped Shan had opened the door slowly to see what the tiger had done.

The bed had been taken apart and spread across the floor. The mattress had be shredded and had some of it's springs sticking out. It was leaning against the wall in the far corner. The cupboard was now on it back and in the middle of the room. It was also now missing a door. Inside had all of Ryoma's blankets, it also had the said cat sitting in it while he watched the man inspect his room. The walls where painted white. Shan would of giving Ryoma some paint for the room, but he could not put it past the boy to use it for the wrong thing and end up either painting himself or painting the cop.

"Ryoma." Shan said slowly. He started to realize something. "Where's the other door to the cupboard?" At this Ryoma lit up.

"Well, the dog next door was annoying. So I sort of chucked the door out of my window and went into the garden next door. I thought it would be rude to go get it back so I left it. Besides I like only having one door to my cupboard it gives me a place to look onto the outside so I can see if there are any intruders." Shan face palmed. How could he get angry at the boy for doing that now. He looked so proud of his success with the room and stopping the dog he didn't have the heart to tell him off.

"Where are your clothes?" The boys face grew even more proud. This was the time Ryoma would of probably told Shan that they had gotten caught in the making of his room, but instead to the blunettes surprise he did the exact opposite.

"I knew you would get angry if I got them all torn up as well, so I put them in the hallway near your room." As the words left the tigers lips, Shan walked up and pulled the boy in to a hug.

"You don't realize how happy you did that." Shan sighed in relief. He hated taking Ryoma shopping. Not only did he have to pay for the ones the boy wanted, he had to also buy the ones he didn't like. In the end Shan had found it much easier to order everything online. Which save him a lot more than he would like to admit. "So Ryoma, do you remember that discussion we had before we left for Japan?" He could only hope the boy was actually listening at the time. Looking down he saw Ryoma's eyes sparkle.

"You... You mean I can play in tennis tournaments?" His mouth open and he was shaking in excitement.

"Yeah, but their is one rule." Shan felt bad knowing this was going to go down hill.

"What is it? I'll do anything. Please, I want to play." He could feel the hug getting tighter as the boy failed to hide all his happiness.

"You'll be starting school tomorrow!" He shouted as Ryoma just turned to stone. The 37 year old man swore he just watched the tiger mentally die inside.


End file.
